Homosexuality and the Church by Paul Roberts
O.K., Here We Go. . .
Well, here’s the first attempt at turning the many thoughts that have been swirling in my head for the last several months regarding what is coming to be one of the most contentious and emotional issues in both American society and the Church: homosexuality.
I don’t want this to be an essay or apologetic for any particular viewpoint. I’m just concerned, and sometimes alarmed at what I hear and see in an increasingly politicized stance in much of conservative Christianity, one which seems less and less about Jesus and faith—and LOVE, mostly in the name of being uncompromised or not yielding to some “liberal agenda”.
I write like I talk, following a host of rabbit trails, so bear with me, or skip ahead, or shake your head. . .
Clobber-Free Zone
When the subject of homosexuality comes up in conversation with most evangelical or conservative Christians (I hate using even these labels, because the inferred meanings vary so widely), you will, with amazing consistency, hear the word “abomination” within the first thirty seconds. You will also hear quotes from the handful of other scripture passages automatically associated with the subject (the so-called “clobber passages”), and just as likely the mention of the “homosexual agenda”.
There’s been plenty of scholarly (and not so scholarly) writing on what the Bible has to say, and maybe I’ll touch on that later, but anyone can do as much research as they want on that by simply surfing the net, coupled with a willingness to listen to different viewpoints without fear of opening up some demonic floodgate. Fear and suspicion surround the subject of homosexuality in the Church, and though I believe in holding fast to undiluted basics of our faith, the last time I checked fear and suspicion still hadn’t made the list of Fruits of the Spirit, so I sometimes wonder what other motivations are really beneath the façade.
O.K., don’t want to move off into speculation. That’s not a rabbit trail, just a dead-end alley! The Holy Spirit alone judges the thoughts and intentions of the heart.
What does concern me is the inconsistent ways that we use scripture to back up our beliefs. The Levitical law, where you find that ever-present “abomination” word is a great example. Were we to apply the whole of the text there, Sunday meetings would have to be followed by ritual stonings, and there might be more people on the receiving end than not! Still there are those that make the argument that there are some parts that are moral code, and thus universal and timeless, while others were specific in application for certain times and/or people. My only point here is that before you use this, or any other scripture to build a theological or moral argument, make sure that you have your hermeneutical and exegetical ducks in a row—and if you don’t even know what those words mean, then take care that you haven’t already been influenced by your culture and personal prejudices or ignorance, and called your beliefs steadfast, biblical truth. If we trust God, we can be sure that He will lead us to all truth. Trust comes from intimate relationship. Fear does not. The Bible is an amazing (and I believe God-breathed) book, but it is not an adequate substitute for relationship with God. Remember a certain dark one who knows the scriptures better than any human. . .and he doesn’t exactly have a bright future.
One other comment about the word “homosexual”: it bears mentioning that this is a relatively modern word, only first appearing in the mid-nineteenth century, and then only appearing in an English translation of the Bible in the mid twentieth century. I’m not trying to make some dismissive argument about the passages now translated using that word, but it is safe to say that, in light of that, we need to be all the more diligent to seek what the original languages were, or could have been, saying if we are to come to a more accurate understanding of what they are conveying to us. This is not a liberal argument! The word homosexual, as well as the vernacular expression, “gay”, are one of the first places where we encounter confusion. So, for some, the idea of orientation and behavior are important issues. Behavior is something you do. Orientation is a more difficult concept. Some might simply say that it is what you are, but that in itself is confusing, or even misleading. I think I’d say that orientation is the combination of your psychological, emotional, and physiological attitude or response to something or someone. Well, a little messy, that one. How about, “Someone with a homosexual orientation is primarily attracted to people of the same sex on an emotional and psychological level.” Still not great, but the issue is that there are many that differentiate between orientation and behavior. Why is that an issue? Deep breath, and. . .
To Be Or Not To Be
The whole orientation issue is of key importance, simply because it’s crucial in the idea of whether or not gay people can (or should) become “straight”. In fact, this is where the battle rages in the Church. When you talk about behavior, it’s a little simpler. You conclude, based on your understanding of the Bible, Church beliefs and traditions, society’s mores, etc., whether or not homosexual acts are right or wrong (and if any are acceptable, in what circumstances). This is a matter of choice. You choose to do something or abstain from it, and are obliged to walk out the consequences of those actions. The Church can include or exclude on the basis of someone’s behavior, or at least all local expressions of the Church do anyway.
Now orientation brings up the problem of choice in a whole other way. If homosexuality is a choice, then return to the previous paragraph, story over. If it isn’t, then you have a problem. For the Christian (or, here are those terms again, the conservative or most of those calling themselves evangelicals), if you believe that there really isn’t any difference between homosexual behavior and orientation, then either the Gospel isn’t for everybody, or there has to be a way for the orientation part to be dealt with. In other words, whether or not you choose to be gay, you have to be able to choose to be straight, and there’s got to be a way for that to happen.
So welcome to the wild and wonderful world of Ex-Gay Ministries! For decades there have been growing numbers of (usually Christian) programs that seek to reorient people from homosexuality to heterosexuality. It starts with behavior, because that’s basically a matter of choice (that’s a huge simplification, and not completely true, but that’s another bunny I don’t want to run after right now). But then, because the vast majority of conservative Christianity views no distinction between behavior and orientation (once again a good reason to revisit what the scriptures are truly saying), the homosexual begins to move from same sex attraction to “normal” attraction to the opposite sex. Then the door is open, as it would be with every other heterosexual person, to choose to engage (or not) with the opposite sex in relationships, including marriage and sex within the parameters of what the Bible and the Church define as those sanctioned and blessed by God. Even the one remaining single and celibate, would still do so as a self-identified heterosexual.
Reality Check
Well, I’ve ramble for a few thousand words too much to get at what I’ve really been thinking about.
My observation is that the majority of (starting to hate this word) conservative Christians would rather not even have to be reminded that homosexuality exists, much less have to deal with it in their own lives or in their local fellowships and communities. It’s an uncomfortable subject. In fact, I think it would be safe to say that a great number of homosexuals would rather not have to deal with the whole issue either, with all of the difficulties that they face in walking through their own feelings, and a largely hostile society. The big problem is that if we take the Gospel’s word for it—and we’d better—then it’s for everybody. And, if everybody, then the homosexual also. That’s where the “clobber passages” come back in. Modern interpretation of these (six or eight, depending on how you translate things) sections of scripture is hotly debated, but the majority of Americans would view them as a condemnation of all homosexual acts, and as mentioned before, of homosexual orientation also. So, if God is just, and the gospel is true, then there has to be a way to change. So you have a lot of churches and ministries embracing the Ex-Gay movement as the way to change, and proof that change happens and is answer for any homosexual wanting to follow Christ.
Switch to the social picture. There are stories in the news literally every day about gay rights, and ballot measures in several states to either affirm or oppose “gay marriage” or “civil unions”, or a definition of marriage as strictly “between one man and one woman”. The religious right views gay rights as a liberal agenda, seeking to undermine the fabric of our society, and a threat to our families and schools, and something to be opposed in all instances. It’s a sticky wicket, no? We are a pluralistic society, but our laws are heavily informed by Judeo-Christian morals and traditions. For someone to oppose homosexual rights/privileges in not just the Church, but our culture, then there is mounting pressure to prove that it’s a choice. Or, if not a choice, an unacceptable state that should and can be changed.
So, of increasing concern to me is the support of ex-gay ministries and “conversion therapy” is not necessarily because they are part of God’s wonderful plan for the homosexual “struggler”, but that they are the kingpin in opposition to acceptance of homosexuality at any level in society (not just the Church), and specific gay rights or marriage legislation. It’s reactionary, and fueled by fear and animosity in many cases. I believe that the over politicization of issues in the Church undermines our focus on the Kingdom, and the Law of Love that Jesus taught. Yes, we are to be active in politics and culture, but we are fundamentally to walk in humility, love, and sacrificial giving as followers of Christ. Maybe I’m splitting hairs here, but I find myself being grieved often as I listen to Christian leaders speak on this subject. There’s something wrong with the spirit of things.
Well, I suppose I need to broach the subject of whether or not people really do change. Is there such a thing as “ex-gay”?
Psychobabble and Empirical Silliness
There are lots of numbers tossed around by all sides regarding the origins of homosexuality. Inborn? Genetic? Learned? Messy combo of some or all? There really isn’t any hard evidence! Truthfully.
Oh, lots of conjecture. Lots of anecdotal information (lots and lots of personal life stories across the spectrum). Really, that’s all either side has (hate saying that there are sides, because again that’s not accurate):the stories of real people. And they are compelling. . .and completely contradict one another. Now, Christianity is fundamentally a matter of faith, so if we’re waiting for definitive proof of anything, we’re all going to turn blue holding our collective breath on that one. Furthermore, I think that science is also fundamentally a matter of faith (oh, I hear it coming already). Yes, there are solid scientific methods and instruments for gathering and analyzing information, but even all of that relies of assumption of some basic theory or tenet that will forever remain unprovable. You can believe that the universe came into being by the will of God in Six days, or that it spontaneously banged itself into existence, but not one of us was there, so we simply have to believe. Yes, it’s based on what we see and learn, but there will always be an element of faith in any world view. Faith is part of life.
So now I’m going to ignore all that I just said and ask, “Is there any proof that people change?” Well, as I mentioned before, there are a lot of figures floating around. Our whole culture loves things that we can understand (often for the function of controlling our environments). We don’t like mystery. We don’t like paradox. We don’t like to say, “I don’t know.” Especially as Christians, even though God makes it undeniably clear that He is the only one who knows all things. So back to proof. Not many studies of any depth regarding etiology of homosexuality, and pretty much only testimonials of change or lack thereof. So let’s look at those. You will find people what have gone through various psychological programs, spiritually based counseling, including prayer and “deliverance”. Some are a part of ongoing support groups, some spend a season in a live-in program specifically focused on healing and change. Some claim great healing in areas of self-acceptance and emotional and psychological stability. Some have claimed a decrease of even disappearance of same-sex attraction. Some have married, had children, and report that their lives are fulfilled and happy.
Then there are those that claim that all they tried only resulted in increased feelings of failure, rejection, more confusion and depression. There are those that have committed suicide, leaving behind notes that indicated that they didn’t know how else to end the struggle (to try to be what they thought was acceptable in God’s sight, or to their church or family). Many end up leaving the Church, losing faith, and rejecting God because they feel that who they are is despicable to Him.
The numbers? Gets harder here. A web surf on this one goes all over. And it depends on how you define change. It seems that the most “hopeful” percentage I could find of those that experience at least some move of orientation from homo to hetero was cited as a little below 25%. NARTH (a group of professional psychologists and psychiatrists that believe in conversion therapy) cited the number of people that experience a complete reorientation at less than 1%. Most studies involving so-called professionals scrapes down toward the zero mark pretty consistently. And of course, the problem with even these figures, as any research design person will tell you, is they rely on self-report instruments. Unfortunately, self-report is the most unreliable of all experimental collection instruments, nearly to the point of not being viewed as having much weight at all. Why? Because people can say anything, and the more emotionally charged the issue is, the more pressure to say what you either want to be true, or what others want to be true, or what you think is supposed to be true (sometimes given the fancy name of “positive confession” in some circles).
Of the many people that I’ve known personally over decades in the Church, the overwhelming majority of the very few who even stay in any kind of fellowship or Christian affiliation are doing the white-knuckle routine: diligently striving to subvert their homosexual thoughts and desires and to act and “be” straight.
To be fair, there are a few who have gotten married, and a few of those are seemingly content and well-adjusted. Just not too many.
No Acting Classes
As Believers, we are instructed to be constantly engaging, by the Holy Spirit, in being renewed and transformed into the image of Christ. There is discipline and work involved, to be sure, but the real life and transformation is from Jesus. In fact, it’s IN Jesus. His life in us.
This is not an act. It’s aligning us with our true created purpose in knowing Him intimately, and worshipping our Lover-Creator. What happens is our spirit, filled with His Spirit, takes its proper place, while soul and body come under that authority, and are redeemed and freed to walk in newness and life. Our true identity emerges.
Now, if homosexuality isn’t a part of that—and most couldn’t see how it could be—then that is one of many things that would pass away as we are renewed in Jesus. Yes, it would seem to be a process, so no worries with dealing with lingering desires and broken patterns. We all do. The thing is, while many are getting healed of wounds and rejection, of consequences of rebellion, and are able to walk in healthy relationships, I’ve not really seen that basic orientation change. Because of that, most get frustrated, feel as if they’re failing, and often give up in their walk with God.
The majority of the rest just start acting like they think they should be (according to their own desire to be straight, or accepted by the Church or God). This makes some somewhat happy, because they often were living very unhappy lives. But many, feeling like they can’t follow God, jump full into the “Gay Lifestyle”, which is really only a part of all homosexuals. Yet it’s what everybody sees: the flamboyant one, the audacious parades and promiscuity. The fetishes and defiance.
And it more and more becomes two sad choices: play the part to be part of the Church and mainstream Christian culture, or throw it all out and jump head-first into the “gay lifestyle”. Yes, there are large numbers of people who seek to reconcile being gay and Christian, and many churches who believe that the two are not exclusive or contradictory. Still, they tend to fall into part of the Church that holds mostly liberal beliefs, and often many that aren’t accepted in mainstream Christianity.
The Emperor Has No Clothes
I think that what I would really like to see is a whole lot more honesty, a whole lot less hostility, and a Church committed to love first, and work out the tough stuff with humility and grace, grace, grace. That doesn’t mean some sort of ecumenical, watered-down Gospel. Actually, I think it would be a great return to the Gospel.
I don’t personally believe that homosexual orientation was part of God’s original design. Then again, neither was people rolling around in wheelchairs or serving God all their lives and still dying of cancer. The world is a broken and tragic place. Isn’t that the very reason that we need Jesus?
Would it be such a tragedy if the Church just admitted that we are largely without the power promised by Jesus Himself through the Holy Spirit? That doesn’t mean we don’t want it. That doesn’t mean that there isn’t some of it in places, but this is definitely not the Church in Acts, and we need to cut down all of the spin that we engage in to try and make up for it. Most of what we do in corporate gatherings is just entertainment. Nothing wrong with that. Let’s just not call it worship, or true fellowship or community.
And homosexuals aren’t changing. At least not orientation. Some are acting out the part, but I don’t see how that glorifies God. Maybe a Church walking in power would see the transformation that most want. Then again, maybe not. It’s part of the mystery. All I know is that a Church unwilling to admit Her powerlessness, and Her hypocrisy, and failing to walk in sacrificial love and humility is giving a message to millions that it’s the Gospel AND something. The Gospel and reparative therapy, or you’re rejected. The Gospel and act in the acceptable (not just moral) way, or hell for you.
In fact, the promiscuity and self-absorbed craziness of what we think of as the Gay Community largely has the Church to blame for giving it so much fuel. People are rejected by family and faith, and end up rejecting the positive, healthy moral and ethical parts of society at large, rebelling against a religious, condemning spirit. And, like any that walk in rebellion and unforgiveness, it ends up being a life-destroying journey. Then the Church points and pontificates, and sees Her hands as clean.
I’m not justifying anything within this portion of homosexuals in our society. If anything, they’ve done more to bring opposition to any gay rights than gain them. However, we’ve created a Church that has made it impossible for gays to come and find love and acceptance because of fear of giving into some liberal or compromised agenda. I’ve got news, the minute you reject on any seeming “principle” over Christ, you’ve already compromised.
At the very least, I believe that fellowships—the conservative evangelical ones—need to openly accept people of homosexual orientation in their midst. No, not behavior. As before, everyone needs to hold a moral and ethical standard for all people in the Body. If that means that you conclude that they have to remain celibate and single, so be it. Many won’t be able to handle that, but at least it’s honest. God may deal with behavioral affectations, that I believe come, not from being gay, but from an attempt to deal with self-rejection by creating an alter-ego of sorts (as in the instance of the ultra-effeminate “queen”). That’s just my theory on that. Still, there needs to be an environment where people of all walks can be embraced (Not tolerated. I hate that whole concept.), and loved as they walk through seasons of greater healing and wholeness.
If the homosexual truly desires to be married (man to a woman, I mean), then they should be supported in that. But once again, walk into it with honesty. Ask why you’re doing it. Be straightforward about the challenges. I believe that for some it might be great. And of course sexual orientation might very well follow a spectrum, as many have suggested over the years, so this might be a much more viable avenue for some than others.
Just no play-acting! If God wants to come and turn every person heterosexual in a second, He can do it, but that’s HIS business. If people want to pursue reparative therapies, then they should, but get real about the “success” rates, and don’t encourage the self-loathing and depression that comes when lack of change is seen as a failure. It isn’t. Any person in Christ is a new creature, period. We need to stop redefining what that means. There seems to be evidence in the scriptures that there won’t be marriage in heaven (and therefore no sex, which is really just a shadow of the spiritual relationship we will have with Christ in eternity), which perplexes many of us. I think it’s that none of us has even the slightest notion of what intimacy with Christ is really like! I know I don’t. Don’t completely know what my point was there, but oh well. . .
We work for Kingdom reality here and now, and in much more fullness than we see it. But we have to labor from rest, not striving. Trying constantly not to be gay, and to conjure up heterosexuality for most homosexuals is like having to constantly tread water in the open ocean. If you stop paddling for an instant, you sink. That’s not life in Jesus. He brings us into the boat! However much of heavenly reality is available, we should want it, but we rest in the fact that our completion and wholeness is accomplished already. No matter what does or doesn’t happen in our lives and the world, He is Lord. It’s a mystery, and He is a mysterious God.
The Body is missing something because there are some parts that have been excluded. I believe there could be a richness that we’ve never seen because of a diversity we’ve never had. We are afraid of compromise, but oops, too late. . .religious forms in place of the Presence of God.
O.K., going a little preachy there. Sorry. God’s still working at the deeper of some of those bitter roots.
My Latest Understanding. . .Maybe
The main question I’ve discussed with close friends about this whole gay thing is, ‘Why do you think that people aren’t changing?”
Here’s a bit of insight that I think I’ve gotten about a (maybe) why:
A few years ago I remember hearing a story on the news about a girl who had been a victim of profound criminal neglect, locked away in nearly complete solitude for most of her whole life, and I believe that she was about 12 when she was discovered. She was a fraction of the size and weight she should have been. She was recovering under medical supervision at the time, and the prognosis was good.
Here’s what came back to mind as I recalled this: they were talking to a linguistic expert about the girl’s development. Her language skills were all but nonexistent, nothing more than animalistic grunts. They were asking the expert if she (think it was a she) though the girl would develop normal speech abilities. The woman replied that it was nearly impossible. Why? Because language skills, among many other cognitive and motor abilities develop over the early years of a child’s life. However, at a certain time in development the brain seems to “hard wire”. After that, additional skills and development are added to this permanent “foundation”. Since this young girl hadn’t developed the right “wiring” with regard language, there wasn’t really a solid foundation on which to build. There was a foundation that had set. The was circuitry that had been “hard-wired” into place. But it wasn’t what should have been.
Much the same is evident in children with normal, healthy development. They learn language easily and effortlessly. Later, after the wiring is complete, they can learn other languages, but with much greater difficulty. Some can do it much more easily than others, but it’s still as if the secondary language is being “layered” over the original (foundational) one, so the process requires translating via the original.
Small children can readily learn several languages when still developing, and are amazingly able to differentiate between them (I worked with an Austrian man married to a Spanish-speaking woman, raising the child in the U.S., and the little girl could easily converse in any of her three “foundational” languages!). Still other people who are immersed in a culture of a second language come to the place where it seems almost foundational, but it seems that they have only gotten so able, by constant use, to speed the extra “step” to the point that it was nearly indiscernible.
So why all this? I think that there may be a lot of parallels with sexual development.
Let me say that I don’t think anyone is born anything with regard sexuality, other than being (except in rare occasions) male or female. We are definitely born with a certain personality type, which may cause radically different developmental responses in different people to the same environments and situations. Given these base physical and personality traits, we then begin the developmental “wiring” process.
There are those that would strongly disagree, but I think that homosexuality develops in some people given the proclivity for it in some personalities over others, coupled with experiences that somehow fail to help the development of relationships that cause one to wire in a way that will result in heterosexual thoughts and desires once the “power” is turned on when puberty is reached.
O.K., way Reader’s Digest junior psychologist, and I have no expertise, but thousand have written about this, and I don’t think that this at all implausible. True? I don’t know. But it would certainly seem to address the “why” question about change. It also circumvents all of the fray about choice, nature vs. nurture, etc. What I think is, no matter what the origins, that once we mature into fully functional sexual beings, the psychological foundation has set. Surely with all sorts of variations and possibilities, but extremely difficult, if not impossible, to rewire.
However, that would leave place for those that are highly motivated, for whatever reason, to behave in a heterosexual fashion, and to “immerse” themselves in a sexual relationship in marriage, and to have it come to the place of seeming almost seamlessly natural. Love grows within the context of fidelity and trust. That’s the beauty of a healthy marriage. But there’s still an “almost” there. It is still a person of foundational homosexual (or perhaps largely homosexual—the possible “spectrum” thing again) layering something on top of that foundation. Not inferior to anything. It just is what it is. We are all navigating life from different perspectives, and with different strengths and weaknesses. No place for the sin of comparison, but a need to be honest and truthful, so that God has permission to work in us.
I just don’t believe that this should be encouraged, or held out as the right or only option for the homosexual who embraces Christian culture (whether truly Christian or not). It all gets back to the HONESTY factor (if I use that word enough, I get a prize!). Homosexuality is such an emotional subject, and elicits strong, even violent responses in people of all sexual orientations. A commitment to honesty is difficult. We’d rather things be the way that we want them to be, not the way they are. It shakes our belief systems, and even our faith. But could the ongoing tragedies like the recent high-profile pastor of a large church (and leader of a millions-strong group of evangelicals) be avoided if we didn’t require people to play-act to begin with?
The Great Divide
I think that this will prove to be the most divisive issue in the Church in this generation. Perhaps even in American culture (eclipsing the abortion debate). I also think that the Enemy has lined up his strategy well, and it’s not one of the Liberal Agenda. That’s an issue to be sure, but why does the Church get so upset when the world acts like the world? Doesn’t that confirm scripture? I think the real problem is when the Church acts like the world, and when we approach things in this politicized environment, with a growing number of religious zealots determined to destroy anyone who would dare threaten “traditional values”, we have set the stage for a crop of modern-day Pharisees under modern-day Roman occupation governments (politics controlling the Church) who will oppose the very heart of Jesus, and think that they are defending Him.
God needs no defender. And if He Himself is not our defender, than no amount of Bible quoting or legislation will save us. Even for all these words, I’m really not trying to prove anything. At the end of everything in my life the only question that’s important is, “Do I trust You, Jesus? Did I let You love me so that I could learn to love?”
Yes this is a personal thing for me. I probably wouldn’t care about the whole gay thing at all, and be angry at having it constantly thrown in my path, save for that it IS my path. It has been since I was made aware of sexuality in a way not of my choosing before I even hit puberty. I’ve been a Christian (in various states of obedience) since I was twelve years old. I’ve hated myself and beat myself up about it countless times, engaging in self destructive, even suicidal behavior (and not in the distant past). I’ve been though various counselors, psychologists, psychiatrists, prayer sessions, deliverance sessions, and even a year-long live-in program. Only a few of these things lacked any validity. God has brought tremendous healing and restoration to my life.
But the one thing that has always brought me back to that hopeless place of despair was that, despite all of the growth and changes, I was still gay. No, not engaging in homosexual activities (I’ve covered that base enough for several depraved lifetimes over the years); I’ve been celibate for many years.
The big lie was that I was only provisionally accepted by God. Yes, I’m saved by faith in the finished work of grace of the cross, but the clock is ticking. Gotta change. Gotta beat this thing. Who I AM is fundamentally unacceptable to God.
No more. I’m not giving up. I’m not giving in. I’m finally taking God at His word. I am accepted in the Beloved. It’s Jesus’ work alone. His blood. His life. My salvation is complete IN HIM. I’m not a second-class Christian. Whom the Son of Man sets free is free indeed.
Now, it really doesn’t make a whole lot of difference where the greater Church stands on this to me personally, all because I really believe the above statements. And my sexuality has nothing to do with the current work in the Kingdom in which I’m engaged. In fact, the mother of a soon-to-be 12 year old son in the neighborhood thanked me yesterday for being a stable role model for her boy while his real father continues to struggle with drug and alcohol addiction. You know what? I am a good role model for this kid, who shows about every sign of being about 120% straight. I can’t demonstrate a happy, loving married relationship, but I can demonstrate how to develop value godly character and truth, and to learn to listen to and walk with God, and to affirm his absolute worth to the Father, and to fight for the redemption of that entire family.
Yes, I’m very closed about my sexual past with most people in my current situation. Not because I want to hide anything or deceive anyone, or be—oi vey—dishonest! It’s that in this season, for however long it lasts, I believe God has called me to be a resource to the Church, and serve it in relation to some completely different issues, and that making homosexuality some big agenda would be destructive and completely selfish. God is challenging my attitudes and life choices. He is also doing that to everyone else in the Church, especially in the days we’re coming into in the world. But for every thing there is a time and season. I know that this will probably emerge as a much more public part of my life, if what I’ve shared here is even partially on track, and as time comes to raise the issue. I’d rather not be distracted by that in my pursuit of Him, but it’s the life that’s been given to me, and my life is not my own anymore. It’s to be spent on Him, and I’m encountering the sacrifices required more all the time. Yet, what I want to see is all that can come to Him not be hindered in any way by any man, so what price is too much to pay for that? He’s already given all.
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